May 20, 2009 ~ Chemo, Again
Today is chemo. Again. (sigh)
You know, since quitting work a few years ago, I’ve always felt that I needed a bit more structure in my life – a little stricter schedule and regimen. This, however, was not what I had in mind. I’m tired of it. My mind and body is tired of being poked and prodded, tired of being injected with poisons and toxins, and tired of a journey that seems so daunting and long. And, yes, I’m tired of being tired too.
Still, there is the blessed hope – the knowledge of whose I am and who is with me. None other than The Great I Am (Exodus 3:14.) It is this that keeps me going – that keeps me taking that next step and seeking His joy and peace. I dare not get myself stuck in the quicksand of despair when He is my encourager and the lifter of my head (Psalms 3:3.) So today, even though it’s a little tougher than usual, I will lean on Him and tell Him how tired I am of this journey – and I know He will lift me out of this ditch by the truth of His Word and by the love that He faithfully shares.
It’s not a bad day, really – just a challenging one that holds the promise of a better ending if I focus my discipline upon what I know to be true – that Christ loves me and has filled my life with blessings. Many, many blessings indeed.
